"..... got some change?"
Have you ever had that feeling that you are changing? Or maybe it hits you one day that you no more think and feel about certain situations and issues the way you used to. I am feeling just like that, it is throwing me into some kind of inner turmoil, I am questioning certain things I have believed in and it is truly unsettling.
I don't think it is a bad thing though because it is too easy to get stuck in some kind of autopilot and just live life like you have default settings just programmed into you to be a certain way. Life doesn't seem to permit us to go unchallenged and thank God for that you know? You should be open to being tested in order to grow and sort through certain assumptions you just pick up that you never question. I mean what if your assumptions are wrong? It just feels uncomfortable when you are going through the process of change and let's be real no one likes to be wrong.
Hey what can I say? That's life and change is one of the only constants in it as I have heard so many times, so it is what it is and everything is everything and... [insert any inspirational quote or almost worn out phrase about change here]
I think probably the most unsettling thing about everything is on some level I know that there is a consequence for growing and changing, I know certain choices and decisions I am making or I am going to make is not going to make me acceptable to certain people who might have embraced me before and that is just something I am going to have to accept.
4 comments:
Ahahaha, actually it's not not funny! For these past few months, I've cried and cried to God for help and understanding concerning some of the things I've experienced. I've read books and Scriptures that totally are in contrast to this Modern day Christianity we practice. But it's been accepted for a loooooong time as the norm, so when one wants to become simple, like the early Christians were, and not get into all these Spiritual-I Know it All - facade we put up nowadays, some folks are likely to target you as maybe not radical or something. It's very unsettling, and disturbing. One thing I say though, my beliefs (opinions on certain issues) might change, and they have, but my Faith remains. And oh, we as humans are always changing. Life changes us, experiences do too. If I'm at the same stage I was yesterday, then well...I think it's better I cease to exist.
Nice write-up. Me thinks you should write more!
haha thanks! for me this blog applies to all things from religion to politics, to art, music etc etc
yeah I write, peep the archive lol
i am back in the saddle though, we'll see!
when i was 6 i wanted to be a nurse.
when i was 16 i wanted to be a fashion designer and i hated the sight of blood
when i was 20 i wanted to be a dancer.
when i was 28 i wanted to be a mother
when i was 38 i wanted to get married.
when i reached 44 i just wanted to be free.
i became some of those things and none of them. change is inevitable. it's how you greet it that counts.
by the way...as you know, i became a teacher and a handbag designer. and i'm ready for the next change.
you speak from the heart.
me likey
x
awwww thank you!!!!!!!!! I totally feel you!
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